


Wildflower Honey

by your_taxidermy



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Fluff, How Do I Tag, Humor, Jacob being a huge dickhead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 10:28:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15839373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/your_taxidermy/pseuds/your_taxidermy
Summary: tumblr request.





	Wildflower Honey

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr request.

Jacob really had a way of making an ass of himself, even when that meant soaking a deer carcass in YOUR bathtub. You were expecting to have a relaxing bath and snuggle up to your soldier boy, but he just had to ruin the plans with going hunting and using the tub to soak the remaining bones. Just as you opened the door to start your water, the horrible stench of rot slapped you in the face and you knew damn well who put it there.

“JACOB. SEED. BRING. YOUR. ASS. DOWN. HERE.” You shouted, seething with rage, hands clenched so tightly your knuckles were ivory.

Jacob heard you yelling for him upstairs and he skipped steps to come to your aid, drenched in dirt and sweat. He was shirtless apart from the red and blue flannel donning his upper half. “What’d I do?” he questioned, brow cocked. “Take this damned deer OUT of my bathroom! You’re such a bastard! GET IT OUT!”

Jacob snickered. “Aw, what? You don’t like ‘em? He’ll make a nice wind chime.”

“I don’t care! Get it out! I haven’t bathed in 3 days!”

“Don’t be like that, he loves you, ya know. But fine, as you wish.” Jacob squeezed by you and lifted the animal out, the water dripping onto the floor and fresh towel you laid out. “You’re disgusting,” you doubled down, washing your hands even though you didn’t touch the thing. “He’s probably cleaner than you, pumpkin, need me to untwist those panties of yours?” Now he was just trying to be annoying. He tossed the animal into the front yard to deal with later. As he walked to the front door, heavy boots on the ground, you stood in the pathway and he looked down at you, confused. “You can hose yourself off out there, country boy, you aren’t stepping FOOT in this house for the rest of the day.”

Jacob sneered and you felt it even as you turned your back. “It’s just a deer,” he muttered.

“And it’s just the place I clean myself! Take care of it. PLEASE.”

You scrubbed the bathtub with a multitude of cleaning products, bleach, ammonia (After a very deep rinse of course), and a crude mix of baking soda and lemon juice. It was good as new and he could see Jacob in the bathroom window, pressure washing the body.

You normally weren’t squeamish but Jacob was a little too desensitized to blood and guts.

Ignoring him, you ran the bath water and relaxed, resting your feet on the faucet. You complained how loose it was several days ago and Jacob seemed to fix it without saying much about it, just like he bought your favorite kind of honey after you said: “the wildflower is the best.”

He did such little things for you.

You finished in your bath and slipped into a robe. It was evening time, the sun was sinking into the mountains and there was a pleasant wind. You saw Jacob sitting on the porch with your dog watching the sunset. “Jake, it’s getting dark… Come inside, I’m sorry.”

“Not until you apologize.”

“I just said I’m freaking sorry, babe!” You felt like a fool for scolding him now, he was just having a fun time, even if it was gross. Jacob sneered, playfully this time. “Come outside with me,” he called. You went out and walked on the porch in bare feet, he pulled you onto his lap and took an inhale of your hair. He said he never did but you knew he was lying. “You made those?” you asked, pointing to the new wind chimes. “Yeah, I did… Made ‘em for ya. The metal ones hurt your ears, right?” you felt him take another inhale of your hair, this time his beard tickled the back of your neck. “Mhmm mmm, they’re just kinda unpleasant, but I like the ones you make.”

You rested your head back on his shoulder, his military jacket stained in dirt and blood. “You need to wash this thing,” you commented, tugging at his cuffs, running your fingers along the folds. “I’ll wash it for you, soldier, that is, if you ever take it off…”

Jacob chuckled deeply. “I ain’t stopping ya.”

You smiled softly, running your hand over the burns on his forearms. “C’mon, babe, let’s go inside, it’s getting cold…”

In a flash, he removed his jacket and placed it over your shoulders, it was far too big for you anyways. “Still cold?”

You leaned into him, feeling safe and secure in his arms.

“Thank you, Jake… I’m sorry for getting so mad.”

“Don’t mention it. Just watch the mountains and how the trees move… how the clouds change colors.”

And so you spent the evening watching nature with him, even if he smelled faintly of rot.


End file.
